In the Name of all that's HOLY, part 2

Last time, on Holy Mother of Twilight Fail, we showed this picture of a egg-donor mom and her faux-tramp enstamped infant. Yes, it was the very definition of "Made of Fail."

Until now.

Oh, that's right. We've found an even greater "What the F@#K!" picture, where the tattoo is actually real.

***WARNING - HAZARDOUS TO HUMAN DECENCY***

There are so many issues of WRONG here that I can't begin to tackle them. I just...words are failing me.

~Lily

In the Name of All that's HOLY?!

This. Just...this. THIS is why I am in favor of selective breeding.

Any brain dead moron can have a child, but you have to have a license to fish.

A temporary tattoo is not child abuse. Growing up in the hands of a "mother" (see in this case, "incubator") who has 1.) an obvious fixation with a phenomena intended for a far younger age group/maturity level and 2.) thinks it's acceptable, and even cute, to express her own preferences in the form of a mark known by the name "tramp stamp" on her infant daughter may indeed be a foreshadowing of future neglect/poor decision making/bad parenting.

This makes me far angrier than it probably should.

~Lily

Very Funny...

A steampunk flowchart:


Yes, yes, teh tumblr is being clever.

Ok, I hate to admit that I do find this funny. I love steampunk - a lot - but still.

I find great amusement in this.

~Lily

An Odd Coincidence

It is just my (unresearched and completely biased) opinion, but Comedy Central's new cartoon Ugly Americans looks like the kind of inane cable garbage that I generally take as a symbol of the immanent apocalypse. And this is coming from a girl who *likes* the paranormal.

I haven't actually watched an episode because 1) I don't feel like sacrificing 30 minutes of my life to such banality and 2) I never claimed to be unbiased in this review so I don't feel I have to justify my opinion of the show by actually watching it. In fact, there is only one thing about Ugly Americans that intrigues me enough to write this post.

After a quick stop by the Comedy Central web site, I learned that the relatively normal looking cartoon man I've seen on the commercials for this show is one of the main characters, a human named Mark Lilly.

Now, it may be just me, but does Mark look oddly similar to anyone else in paranormal pop culture?

Someone that is, oh, maybe an *icon* of the paranormal right now?

Someone who causes grown women to act like tweens and tweens to act like they're experiencing the second coming of the Beatles?

A certain undead vegetarian heartthrob, perhaps?
Is Mark Lilly of Ugly Americans a cartoon version of Edward Cullen?

Maybe a slightly closer shot.

I leave it to you to decide.

~Lily

Next on the Menu: Lemur Stew

Dear Amazon, Penguin Publishing, and anyone else that stands in my way:

If I do not get my JR Ward ebook on April 27th, ten thousand lemurs will die!  Tell this guy to his face that everything will be all right.

Best wishes,
Helena

Oh Stephanie, what have you done?

This made me smile and shake my head. Honestly, put down your daughter's fluffy fodder and get you a grown up lady book...they make those with vampires and shifters too.

According to the Novel Ingestion Board, aka ME, Twilight substitution for moms equals Charlaine Harris' Sookie Stackhouse series.

~Helena

Bitten at New Moon

According to an article in the Expressindia, Erin Westrate a 17 year old went to the theater like many of us to indulge in the guilty pleasure known as New Moon.  Little did she know, the movie would have more of a "bite" than she bargained for.  Westrate was grabbed and bitten by a 40ish year old man at the end of the flick after enduring sexually suggestive comments during the screening.  Come on people...keep your teeth to yourselves.

~Helena

Right, Cause Kids Aren't Frightening Enough

This. This is the definition of taking the whole vampire fad too far.



~Lily

Volunterism's Blatant Theft of Pop Culture

What do you do when you see blood donor numbers dropping? You make a shameless vampire plug to draw in the Twilight and Vampire Diaries crowd, of course.



That's ok, Doc, take an extra pint. The pale look is in now.

~Lily

Vampire Barbie???

A recent article announced that Mattel will be producing plastic replicas of the Twilight saga characters.

These Barbies might not be as flammable as the vampire models, but at least we can have the satisfaction of watching them melt after being doused in lighter fluid. (Kids, please do not try this at home. Parents, I warned them, yet I do not completely disapprove of said behavior.)

For the sake of humanity, please do not force people fifty years down the road to open a time capsule and have one of these burn their retinas out.

~Helena